Some of the best lessons you learn end up being the most annoying reminders on a day to day basis. A prime example of this would be the classic debate between victim blaming vs. personal responsibility, a lesson that happens to someone almost every single day. What is victim blaming? Picture this: Someone cuts you off and you immediately start to curse them out and fly into road rage. You feel justified in your anger because they cut you off, but not the other way around, right? The answer would be a resounding no, unless you want to play the victim card and allow that incident to literally dictate your day.
That is one small incident of many incidents that occur daily where we get to choose to be the victim or take responsibility. Sometimes it feels good to be the victim and place the blame on that inconsiderate driver or the rude server at the restaurant… but it will also lead you down a path of negative and cynical thoughts. Conversely, taking responsibility for your actions is freeing, powerful, and puts you in total control of having positive and optimistic thoughts.
It has become an annoying reminder because my wife and I will call each other on these instances throughout the day. The crappy part about that is when she calls it out, she’s right every time because it’s so easy to fall into the victim trap. I’m blessed to have her around to not allow me to play the victim card but I certainly don’t always feel blessed as she is calling me out. Look around your own life and see if you can give someone permission to take full responsibility, and stop victim blaming in times where bettering yourself is the right option.
I challenge everyone to stop and ask themselves if they are being the victim vs responsible. Are you taking responsibility for your actions? Remember you cannot stop an emotion from happening, but you can control how you respond. Stop and ask yourself the question, am I being a victim or responsible? It will allow you to respond and not react. This is not easy but will serve you well for a long time to come and your days will be so much better!
Looking to learn more about victim blaming vs personal responsibility, or other mindful coaching techniques? Explore the Let’s Go Win self empowerment podcast to help you transcend in your life!